"The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative."
By Bruce Feiler The Stories That Bind Us NYTimes March 15, 2013.
Bruce Feiler's article gives a huge endorsement to the importance of preserving our family story and incorporating it to the family's consciousness! After his family reached what seemed like a breaking-point at a multigeneration reunion, Bruce Feiler's father felt that their family was "falling apart." Bruce who instinctive felt that the family was stronger than ever, was left with food for thought. He goes on to describe and summarize interesting current research trends on what makes a family stronger. The conclusion is what every genealogist wans to hear: "The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative."
I think this so true. It has brought my siblings and I closer since I have started researching and talking about our family history. I have even reconnected with cousins on both sides of the family. It is fun to remember our youth and our families.
ReplyDeleteI think the article was talking more about younger children, but you are right Betty, genealogy brings families together whether it's siblings or distant cousins. When 3rd and 4th cousins realize the history they share, it really brings them together.
DeleteSmadar, thanks for sharing that! Great quote and insightful article. I'd like to check out his book. Of course, very reinforcing for family history researchers.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked it! I have his Abraham book on my book shelf. I haven't read the Secrets of Happy Families. Sounds fascinating!
DeleteI enjoyed the article very much. Even when my kids "roll their eyes" when I start talking family history, they often refer back to the stories.
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how much "eye rolling" there is. I find that they are very interested in stories about the grandparents they know, but not so much older generations. As parents we find tell family intuitively, but I never thought of the benefits of combining family hardships with triumphs as a way to help them build self esteem. Thanks for stopping, Lisa.
DeleteThanks for sharing the post. I think our family has done a good job of sharing the stories. With our tween grandchild that we adopted, it has made a difference for him. I would not have given it a thought but the article makes it clear sharing family history does matter. He has a better understanding of how he fits into the family and the family history than some of the kids his age. Very interesting.
ReplyDeleteI bet for an adoptive child, it's even more important, Ann. Having a sense of who you are, how you came to decide to adopt, where your family came from and how special he or she is to be chosen to be part of an amazing family, really helps keep one grounded! Congratulations on a job well done!
DeleteFamily members don't realize that a "strong family narrative" will strengthen their sense of self. But it will! Since genealogy is so popular these days, I'm hoping that even the children will catch on to this method of learning about the past and about themselves. Once your interest is caught, genealogy doesn't let you go!
ReplyDeleteSo true Mariann. Genealogy is addictive isn't it! I do think that it does require some maturity before it grabs you though. I like the way Bruce spoke of intentionally it weaving into a narrative as part of your everyday life. I think understand the benefits can really help families make family history telling an intentional effort. At the same time, honor everyones time table and maturity. They will come around!
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